Murphy, Dan

"Global hunger to grow by 104 million in '09" -UN Food and Agriculture Organization Donate to Save the Hollow Tree

Gordon Campbell's in-basket Vicki Huntington "Hiya, bub!"

USA celebrating the imminent incarceration of Marc Emery

Hardest part of an RCMP apology: Finding the right card Sorry we killed you

Bound to give Susan Boyle even more stress- News that her former eyebrows are writing a tell-all Tap! Tap!

Guess Your Weight "An ounce!" Jim Flaherty's First Job

Pretty Good Sign You've Got A Counterfeit doughnut* *Should be an Old Fashion Glazed.

Vancouver City Hall "The Olympics are coming! Take these brooms and sweep Marc Emery under the rug!" The Next Day- "He smoked the brooms."

If the Cloverdale Rodeo were held in Kitsilano- Veal Bemoaning The Bullriding/Cappuccino-Making Event Bronco Chakra Reading Cow Yoga

From the Office of Acting Commissioner of Apologies, Sgt. P. Preston Sterger RCMP Command Headquarters, Ste 86, 1200 Vanier Pky, Ottawa, On, K1A 0R2 Dear Sir or Madam, Re: Your recent tasering, [...]

Carole James wins- "Yay!"

Murphy's Election Low[High]lights April 14: Writ is dropped and candidates, with the exception Ray Lam, toss their hats into the ring. John van Dongen bags NASCAR endorsement. Union ads quick to [...]

[Large pig as a parade inflatable]

EU votes to ban Canadian dead-seal stuff- "Gee, that does hurt."

Reeling from the enviro-pounding she's endured, Carole James takes a break to commune with nature- "whew" Whump

Kinda Hoping You'll Maybe Consider Us in 2013 Head Green Jane Sterk secretly wondered whether she was being too darn pushy. Carole James' (muffled) defence of her Carbon Tax position. Campbell's [...]

Also running- Single transferable vote Professional politicos

"I would've done it in two days." "I would've followed up with some miracle tax cuts." James and Campbell, in election mode, on the Resurrection

Two concerned public sectors on why they are against Dr. Keith Martin's bill to decriminalize pot: "bad for business!"

"And to greet all visitors to the new Vancouver Convention Centre, we now unveil a statue to commemorate Premier Campbell's unequalled vision on this project!"

LOWER MAINLAND ADVISORY In a bid to save time, citizens are asked to draw a chalk outline of themselves on the ground before approaching local police personnel while holding absolutely anything. Thank you

A plea from head Mountie William Elliott concerning the Dziekanski inquiry "I would just ask Canadians not to jump to any conclusions until the RCMP is finished lying to them." This has been a plea [...]

HE IS ARMED WITH A LOADED STAPLER RCMP eye chart

Vancouver 2010 Promises a lot of Olympic "Firsts" 1st to modify the Games' motto Swifter, Faster, Duck! 1st where biathlon competitors face returning gunfire 1st to have the chalk outline of an official mascot on the street "Nothing to see here."