Peterson, Roy

"sigh!" TALIBAN TO ELIMINATE ALL ANCIENT MONUMENTS NOT ACCEPTABLE TO AFGHANISTAN GOVERNMENT

"Remember when they used to make US pay by voting us out of office?" MLAS WILL BE PAID THOUSANDS FOR LOSING

As the days dwindled down, Ujjal would rehearse variations on the traditional election announcement. ABANDON SHIP! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! WE'RE ALL DOOMED! GERONIMO! DIAL 911! OHTHE HUMANITY! WHO LET THE DAWGS OUT? WIPEOUT! FIRE IN THE HOLE! AAAARRGGHH!

"We are the political party of change. We can now make change for any large bill you might want to invest in B.C. please?" NATURAL GAS TAX

CANADIAN ARMED FORCES FLIGHT TRAINING SCHOOL (DND BUDGET RESTRICTIONS IN EFFECT) "Next"

"So, Brazilian mad cow disease may not be the problem." "The problem may be the effect of Brazilian sane cow beef on Brazilians." CANADIAN FOOD INSPECTION TEAM

"What's your problem? Our human rights counsellor reports to me the same way your ethics counsellor reports to you."

"I'm sorry, we still can't reach him " TOUGH LOVE

"Is there a sub~sub~sub~ basement?" RECORDS, DOCUMENTS & EXCESS PARAPHERNALIA STORAGE PLEASE BE PATIENT

"Gene Who? OttaWhere? Since When? Say What? And Why eh'?" DUBYA 5

Meanwhile, in B.C., Gordon Campbell realized that Groundhog Day would be delayed yet again. "Ujjal?" LATEST POLL NDP 18%

SUPPORT FOR QUEBEC SEPARATISM FALLS TO 37%: THREE IN FIVE UPSET BY LANDRY'S FLAG COMMENT Mini-Ami

Q: WHAT CAUSES JEAN CHRETIEN'S DYNAMIC POWER NAPS? A: TWO WORDS. Western alienation Z

PARTI QUEBECOIS SEPARATION SOCIETY & ETHNICALLY CHALLENGED MARCHING BAND. Bernie NEVER marched to the beat of a different drummer.

D for Departing'

["A subsidy for the forest industry is important, Gordon, but other cabinet ministers want to spend us out of this mess too..."]

[Lucien Bouchard depicted as taking various cutting implements to a maple tree]

"For my next illusion TOUGH LOVE for whichever part is west of me!"

HELL "I still say this is just another snow-job from the Middle East peace talks."

THE NEXT MILLENNIUM! (DEAL WITH IT!) "Buzz off kids, I've secured THIS franchise in perpetuity."

Pork & Has Beens

"Organic Two to base: Either public reaction is more hostile than anticipated or those little moth boogers've got guns!"

"SOS ... Save Our Souls ... Ships ... Sailors ... Seas ... States ... Society ..."

"LAGER LOUTS FOREVER!"