Rice, Ingrid

Spam and the workplace "Stan's really become an asset to the company since he upgraded his keyboarding speed." "...We're almost getting a full day of work out of him now that he's up to 120 deletes per minute."
"How can we compete with a mad cow?" "SARS, SARS, SARS. What about Lyme Disease?" "Mosquitos and West Nile Virus - that's all anyone ever talks about. It's like we never existed." "And now we've been [...]
How competition affects gas prices "It's 86.9 across the street" "We can do better than that"
"Looks like Bill's installed the latest virus patch for Windows"
"He must be honoured to be in the presence of such an important person" "Just think- now he can go back and tell his grandkids he met a firefighter"
"Of course same sex marriages pose a threat to our family values and way of life" "Given a choice between a judgemental, inflexible, puritanical mate and a fun-loving, show tune humming mate with a [...]
More low wattage in Ontario "I'm all for energy conservation! The more everyone conserves- " "-The longer I can keep my air conditioner running."
Rolling blackouts, B.C. style
Grade 2 "Back to school list?" Grade 6 "Back to school list?" Grade 12 "Back to school list?" University "Tuition?"
After a summer of tinkering, Ed figures out how to beat the high cost of gas "Methane"
Margaret begins to harbour doubts about her career choice of public relations:
Reporting back on the failed Canada/U.S. softwood lumber talks: "We suspected the U.S. coalition for fair lumber imports didn't want a deal when they slapped a 27% tariff on the olive branch we offered them"
"This really burns me. The Vatican is shoving its nose where it has no business telling us what to do and how to run our country" "Well, that takes a lot of gall. Who the heck do they think they are? [...]
"All this because of a cigarette" "I guess what is said is true: they really do stunt growth"
Credibility Gap
"We might as well not exist. Got no representation. Always being ignored. No point even voting since elections are decided before our polls close. Just a pat on the head for the Olympics and it's [...]
"I see Air Canada is serious about winning back customers" "They're going to stop serving those complimentary in-flight meals!" Short haul flights end automatic food service
Iranian wheels of justice; Photojournalist silenced
"Yes, that's right. We need all 5 lower mainland phone books right away!" Vancouver Telus users angered by phone book being split into 5 regions; Other directories will be supplied on request
"Just when I thought he couldn't get any lamer" Manley's exit from race leaves Martin as de facto Liberal leader
"Ottawa's balking at giving us the cash we need for the Rav rapid transit mega project" "What can we do to get Chretien to cough up $450 mil?" "Build it in Shawinigan, Quebec"
Corrective measures Canada - U.S.A. Border; Attention Canadian beef banned due to BS
The legalization of same sex marriages presents a new complication in same sex relationships "How long am I gonna hafta wait for that Bozo to put a ring on my finger?" "How long am I gonna hafta wait for that Bozo to put a ring on my finger?"
Overheard at the United Nations "So after all that, it turned out there was no proof of weapons of mass destruction in Iraq???" "Nope, just a weapon of mass deception in the White House."
"$39 mil. in performance bonuses paid out to senior bureaucrats for meeting expectations?... Well, I guess I can't quibble" "All along I've said they were a bunch of money wasting incompetent bunglers. They've more than surpassed my expectations!"