Raeside, Adrian

Back to school:
"It's called the B.C. Ferry and Marine Worker's Union Memorial Bridge."
The Canadian immigration department gets tough on illegal migrants:
"Doc, I have this uncontrollable urge to leap off a tall building!" "No problem, I can talk you through it." "I have a compulsion to play Russian roulette with a machine gun." "Group therapy should [...]
"Hello base? We've spotted another suspicious ship off the West Coast. It's quite ancient, badly in need of repair, poorly provisioned and low on fuel. The conditions on board must be appalling!"
"Get the bags willya."
If the federal NDP was responsible for the evolution of the human race:
"Gee, what makes them think we'd want to take that water, anyway?"
"...And if that wasn't bad enough, the public sector union took away my pension."
[Vancouver Island travel woes]
[Glen Clark depicted as using a slot machine]
"I knew it was a mistake to let that dog we found on the illegal migrant's boat, stay in the country..."
[Federal tax relief depicted as refreshment coming too late for a skeleton in the desert]
["Ronald Reagan Presidential Library"]
"Here you are, your change, your receipt, and my resume."
"O.K. with our travel budget for this winter, here's what we can afford... Option one: Fly to Vegas, two nights, air and hotel, then fly to Gstaad Switzerland, air, hotel and lift tickets, then on to [...]
"Your theory on substances added to officer Stopford's coffee warrants the question: What exactly are you guys putting in your coffee?"
"Oh sure, just like last time: "Were only popping in to fill a couple of water barrels, we won't take anything of stay long, honest...""
["Canada; Beware of dog; Immigration; Ottawa"]
NDP Water Torture: "AAAARGGH!"
"Captain! Captain! Canadian immigration authorities have spotted us." "Jackpot!"
How to prevent a nuclear holocaust:
"After my son graduates from medical school, he's going to practice in a country where the govt. fails to provide even the most basic medical care like cat scans, MRI's heart surgery..." "Nigeria? Chad? Somalia?" "Canada."
"Hello security? We got some wacko who says he's here to "wid us of our wabbits"..."
"Hello you have reached Immigration Canada. Our offices are closed, but if you want to report a boatload of illegal refugees, press 1. If you are an illegal refugee applying for refugee status, press [...]