Raeside, Adrian

"I've had it with the banks and their stinkin' mergers, downsizing and service charges! I'm taking my money out and putting it under a mattress!"
Unfortunately, Pan-Am Games officials didn't include Viagra in their list of banned performance-altering substances... "Heyyy... Nice butt!"
"Boy, with the power out from that lightning storm it's good to be home." "You bet." "It's so dark out there I had a tough time actually finding the house." "Lucky." "But I'm really worried about my [...]
"Lately, I've been feeling ill, depressed and helpless, and the DND in Ottawa refuses to admit there is a problem." "Exposure to PCB's?" "Exposure to Sea Kings."
Q: How do you give taxpayers immediate relief? A: Ship the bogus refugees back to China in the Pacific Cat ferry.
Cuban Athletics: 100 Yard Dash Hurdle Shot Put "And now, the latest from the Pan Am Games..."
"...And the USS Stennis has the destructive capability equal to three NDP governments."
"Say, can I put you on hold?"
"I got this from a Croat in Croatia...I got this from a Muslim in Bosnia...I got this from a Serb in Kosovo..." "...And I got this from the DND in Ottawa."
"O.K. you're on your cell phone, you've been hijacked and stuffed into the trunk of your car...what did you say your name was?" "The NDP party."
["Bogus refugees; Immigration Canada"]
Glen Clark's Cabinet: Minister of Aboriginal Affairs Minister of Ferries Minister of Finance Minister of Fast Ferry Apologies Minister of Apologising for Glen Clark Minister of Pretending Everything's Hunky-Dory Minister of Self-Interest
"First, I'd like to introduce you all to Gordon, our new band leader"
"If you think I treated you with contempt, don't feel bad, I treat the rest of Canada this way too."
["Fast ferry excuse of the day: alien force fields are influencing the warp drives"]
"It's just a flesh wound." Public; The party; Brian Gardiner; Dosanjh; Mac Phail
"I dunno about the problem the hospital is having with rabbits, but I do know that the food here has improved dramatically."
"Arr matey! Fer the price of a pint, oi'll tell ye the location of a ship that went down hereabouts, takin' with it millions of dollars." "You're on! What's the name of this ship?" "Princess Maguerite III."
"That @*!!? David Anderson is ruining the fishing on the coast!" "Ever since that @!?*! David Anderson turned up, the salmon fishing has been the pits!" "It's nice not to carry all the blame for a change..."
"Aw geez, our favourite camping spot is ruined! What wiped it out...bug kill?... Logging companies?..." "Last year's campfire."
"We're high in the polls, and the party is awash in cash. What more could we need?" "Compassion?"
Further to Gordon Wilson's suggestion of a frequent ferry user's card: For Glen Clark For Gordon Wilson For Moe Sihota
"We're rather short handed these days, would you mind pepper spraying yourselves?"
West Coast Fishery Identification Chart
["Ripoff artists, bandits, thieves, highway robbers"]