Peterson, Roy

THE NHL AN ANCIENT AMUSEMENT. "I think it used to be a sport, son, but it ended up as just a game of tag for millionaires "

POLL: 67% WANT REFERENDUM ON SAME-SEX MARRIAGE

IRAQ ELECTION. SUNNI. SHIITE. KURDS. "Lookin' good!" "Could be worse "

"GUARD! I'm ready to cast my write-in ballot!" SADDAM HUSSEIN X

"Gosh, Mr. Dithers, isn't it about time you got out of the office and started running for election again?" "Not now, Deadwood! You know I'm up to my kneecaps in old business "

"some future president is going to say, "Why are we paying to defend Canada?" "Y'mean Arnold Schwarzenegger, don't you?"

"I didn't order the Orange Revolutions Surprise!'" "Wait'll George feeds you The Liberty American Style' main course "

U.S. PROTECTIONIST TRADE POLICIES. CANADIAN TRADE. CHINA TRADE. "HELLO BIG BOY!"

"MOOOOO!" CATTLE ENRICHED FEED

"And did y'noo forget what day it is again?"

And so, to show this nation's respect to all tsunami victims, Canada's flag was lowered to half-staff from British Columbia to Newfoundland.

"uh-oh!" 2005 JUST MARRIED

Hey Kids You'll have more fun playing the game than watching it! Cheers, Santa.

"I hear that you prefer to purchase used military equipment "

Scrooge was better than his word. CANADIAN APPEAL FOR REDUCED TAXES. NO.

WALKING SMALL. UKRAINE ASKS CANADA TO SEND 1500 VOLUNTEER ELECTION OBSERVERS "Minority governments aside compared to Ukraine we're giants."

LATEST POLL: LANDRY NOT POPULAR "Good news! Sixty-three per cent of our supporters want to separate!" "The bad news is they want to separate from you "

"Welcome to Bruno's Striporama Club! Tonight, direct from the Department of Immigration, and proving that she has nothing to hide Ms. Judy Sgro!"

"I've always considered Canada to be America's good ol' sidekick!" "and our side has been hurting ever since."

UKRAINE ELECTION "What? What?!"

THE PAUL MARTINI <br_/> 4 parts Sponsorship bath water (hot) 1 part Gagliano liqueur 1 part George Bush sour mash bourbon 10-20 dashes Carolyn Parrish bitters (optional) 1 part Sgro's Romanian [...]

HAPPY HOUR AT THE LIMBO LOUNGE "He dumped me Sheila! He dumped me! Cast me off like some old boot that stomped on that moron, Bush! Not even a hug, Sheila " "Oh, I know! I know! The brute did the [...]

Official Canadian Welcome Wagon and Backbencher's Civil Decorum Checklist. ACCEPTABLE COMMENTS: "Welcome President Bush." "Mild, isn't it?" "Long time no see." "Will you be doing your John Wayne [...]

SQUARE ONE Yasser Arafat 1929-2004