Peterson, Roy

THE TOKE'N'MUNCHIES DERBY. Post Time: JUNE 28th, 2004. RHINOPLASTY (By DEFAULT out of SIXTIES SLACKER) Jockey: WHOEVER, DUDE. MORNING LINE: Rhinoceros Party entry / Starts far out / Needs wide path / [...]
THE FEDERAL PENSION CLAIMING PURSE. Post Time: JUNE 28th, 2004. WHERE'S REN? (By NEVERENDUM out of BOREDOM) Jockey: GILLES DUCEPPE. MORNING LINE: Quebec stable queen / Unusual contender for Federal [...]
THE TAX'N'SPEND COLLECTION PLATE. Post Time: JUNE 28th, 2004. FLAK ATTACK JACK (By PIE IN THE SKY out of DIRTY THIRTIES) Jockey: JACK LAYTON. MORNING LINE: Toronto socialist jockey / Blue collar [...]
THE FEDERAL RIDING CHALLENGE. Post Time: JUNE 28th, 2004. C' - RISK IT (By NECESSITY out of OBSCURITY) Jockey: STEPHEN HARPER. MORNING LINE: Little known horse out of the West / Reformed Alliance [...]
THE SPONSORSHIP STAKES. Post Time: JUNE 28th, 2004. SMARTY GRITS (By SCANDAL INQUIRY out of CHRETIEN'S DEPARTURE) Jockey: PAUL MARTIN. MORNING LINE: Can we go the distance to a minority win / Has [...]
"Look Milt we're still flying!" "I do miss the old government parachutes though "
"Don't let em in, Lucy! I don't see Brad Pitt anywhere!"
PARLIAMENTARY COMMITTEE SPONSORSHIP SCANDAL INQUIRY "Sorry we have to cover you up, but we need to display these election posters."
What if today's government planned the original D-Day invasion? "At ease, Private Turvey, we won't need you today. We've decided to send politicians rather than soldiers."
ELECTION CALL "On your mark "
"Mister President, because the Canada U.S. relationship is so central to our respective interests, we must develop a more sophisticated relationship based on informed dialogue, shared values and [...]
THE APPRENTICE (CANADIAN VERSION) "I am NOT fired! I am STILL hired! I am NOT fired! I am STILL " Robert Milton AIR CANADA (Investment Inquiries Welcome)
IRAQ. NEW WEST BANK POLICY. MORE TERROR
DALAI LAMA SPEAKS WITH WORLD LEADERS ON SPIRITUAL' MATTERS "The good news is that you ARE paranoid but only in the spiritual sense."
Meanwhile, deep within the Pantheon of Canadian Humour
"Look! We've got six more just like this one! And you thought we'd wasted all that Sponsorship Scandal money in Quebec " "Party on, Dudes!"
Avian Flu Slaughter Feared News item "Sigh "
" and I hope this parachute display takes your mind off all those rent-a-vote Liberal Party members' who've been nominating our other candidates."
CANADIAN AIRPORT SECURITY DO NOT CROSS "So I'm thinkin' who has more experience with security issues than 4,500 ex-cons with criminal records?
CANADA DANISH SPAT ERUPTS OVER TINY HANS ISLAND "Look Ma'am, no Hans?" "You see, John Ralston? WE weren't allowed to take OUR circumpolar tour to Denmark and now Denmark is taking THEIR circumpolar tour to Canada!"
"I KNOW it doesn't work. I've been wearing the thing for weeks now and nobody's given me $12 million yet!" VILLENEUVE DENIES GETTING $12 MILLION TO WEAR CANADA LOGO
PAST LIBERAL FINANCIAL MISMANAGEMENT "Lift, Paul lift!"
"Surfs up!"
"CRONYISM BEGONE!" "I'll wait in the limo "
TERRORISM. THE SPANISH MASSACRE "Cowards! You used to take credit immediately!"