Rice, Ingrid

SUDDENLY, THE HOPE OF AN IMPROVED NEW YEAR DIDN'T SEEM SO DISTANT...
"You call that a helicopter?" 1993 "Now that's what I call a helicopter!" 1998
"So what with the bird flu so much in the news and no cure and all well, we just can't afford to take any risks sorry big guy, but we're gonna hafta let you go."
Out of professional courtesy, Father Time visits Dr. Kevorkian
"You have a new patient he's wondering how long it takes that Internet arthritis cure to work"
[Paul Ramsey depicted as being returned to a retail store]
"God bless us everyone except for the federalists"
Concern over the recent state of Canadian air travel causes Ed to select a safe alternative
1. PHONY CHARITIES; 2. TELEMARKETING; 3. THE SENATE; TOP SCAMS PERPETRATED ON THE CANADIAN PEOPLE
"It's Billy from next door he wants to sell us his unused emission allotment for $50"; In the spirit of Kyoto
"Our Iraqi children are starving " " and it's all the fault of the Western capitalist pigs"
"My trip to the West was a success. Once they met me in person, they seemed almost eager to see us go!"
"More good news! We are way ahead of schedule in meeting our deficit target"
If Chretien had been Prime Minister in 1938: "Adolf and I are pleased to announce we'll be co-hosting a symposium on human rights"; TOPICS FOR TRADE NEGOTIATIONS WITH 3RD REICH; SUBJECT: TANKS AND GAS PELLETS
REFORM PARTY DOUBTS GLOBAL WARMING POSES THREAT; Two ways Canada can reduce gas emissions
RECALL CAMPAIGN UNDERWAY SKEENA AND PRINCE GEORGE MLAs TARGETED; "What do you mean Skeena Cellulose isn't in the Skeena riding?"
"Just trying to make those guys from China and Indonesia feel at home"; RCMP defend using strong-arm tactics to suppress APEC protesters
MAJOR JAPANESE BROKERAGE FAILS; GLOBAL FALLOUT: INVESTORS FEAR MARKET MELTDOWN; "He wants to be prepared for a market rebound"
Red carpet treatment befitting APEC dictators
Saddam Hussein's custom designed bulletproof vest
"It's the Postal Union with another job security demand they want us to ban faxes and e-mail"
BC Ferry fare increase
GLOBAL WARMING THREAT; Somewhere in Winnipeg
EQUAL STATUS FOR ALL CANADIANS (NO EXCEPTION); "HEY! Where's my seniors' discount?"
VANCOUVER STREET VENDORS WELCOME APEC